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If this were really happening what would you think?

Sunday, June 27, 2004

3:42PM - No surprises

Alot of time has passed since my last entry (cue an appalling "sex" joke) and i have read what i have written in this. It seems that i must be the most miserable person in the world, at least i come first there though. I am going to stop writing such utter sadness now.
Anyway i am doing quite well at the moment due a mr Peat and his face. Not his actaul face, that was an attempt to try to shorten "David has introduced me to faceparty" but it didn't make sense.
yeah so im quite happy at the moment, and a lto has happened, can't fill you in just at the this moment (cue yet another "sex" joke) but will later. Is my life riddled with endless jokes on sex? I don't think it is, though i do worry.

Current mood: awake

Wednesday, May 19, 2004

8:50PM - "Paddington bear raped me" claims the ghost of Tony Benn

Well in a brilliant situation, if situations are brilliant. If not, then i'll get away from that situation and climb into a, i dunno, street of thinking, and be brilliaant there.
I can't say anything incase something terrible happens, but i will do after its confirmed. Not that i'm getting married to Jesus, i'm not, i'm just in a brilliant street of thinking.
12 memories is a brilliant album.
Everything is brilliant. Including everyone reading this. Give yourself a pat on the back, unless you're paralysed from the neck down, then shout the friend to do it for you. If thats not possible then shout this to yourself "I am brillaint and proud of it". That'll keep the wolf from the door.

Current mood: Ruddy Bloody Good

Sunday, May 16, 2004

8:34PM - Choice to live my life extended

At football we played well and we lost 8-7 to a bigger better team, so im proud of us. I got 5 thats 15 for the season in all comps so im happy in total.
Got my best of made by Oli, hes put a few shit ones on for some reason, but on the whole its great.

Thats the day today, on the day Cliff Richard announced he was pregnant.

Current mood: awake

Saturday, May 15, 2004

9:39PM - Oooh you've caught me

Eurovision is political bollocks with a drunk coomentating on the whole embarrassing affair.

NEWCASTLE ARE IN EUROPE YES! Ok its the UEFA cup, but we're still in europe.

Oh yeah a great situation is building thanks to Kris so im currently happy.

Off for revision now, i hope i revise, i really, really do. I have to do well.

Yesterday me and wod went to olis with rushy and we played football so it was fun, thats all i've done, as today i only woke at 3.30.

Blah blah blah blah blah. Blah.

Current mood: awake

Friday, May 14, 2004

9:56AM - shit your leg off

Out of business early so i get my reward of sitting at a computer. Got the eminem album yesterday, its very good, i really like it. I dont like the other stuff but marshall mathers is a very good album.
Newcastle are out of the champ league, so i feel dejected and annoyed and hurt and all the other feelings that follow a disappointing season like that.


I have a geled mohican today, it looks ridiculous to be honest. At first i thought it looked ok but it doesnt at all. Oh well life goes on. Sadly.

Only 3 more lessons left and then i get to go home and do nothing. Hip hip hurry away from me.

Nothing else to say.

Current mood: I don't know anymore

Monday, May 10, 2004

5:00PM - 2+2=5

Thats a lie. Radiohead should be blamed for the poor mathematics exam results from here on afterwards.
Done nothing today, bollocks in total. Absolute bollocks. Still i have a sausage barm to look forward to eating. Thats it though.
YES only one more week of the shitty hell, known as winstanley college.

Thats it except that danwods birthday iss goin to have lots of people at it, can't wait, should be fun.

Current mood: apathetic

Friday, May 7, 2004


Thats the writing on the wall, as they say. Its to the left of me in B19. I'm on my own as usual but that doesnt bother me anymore, i feel so redundant though, there really is NOTHING to do round here. Newcastle lost last night, very sad. I am proud of them, but overall, with 4 main players out, we werent good enough. Maybe next time.
I have got the prodigy album from the library its quite good, the second one they did before they went shite.
Cinema tonight me, wod, ak, hedge, dids, kris and rhino will be coming to watch the new jim carrey movie. I hate him, but with some luck a fit girl might go and watch it and perhaps sit next to me, yeah that will definitely happen. More like we sit stone faced through the comical opening, coming towards a moral of the stroy ending we're he regrets what he's done, and then go home and me and danny sit outside my house eating chips until midnight.
On saturday i might revise, i need to, theres nothing to do is there? On sunday we have a soccerdome match when ozzy will play for sure. 3 subs we'll have so we have no excuses if we lose. "He's got more graves than jesus has ozzy" slandered danny. I doubt thats true though, as ozzy has never, to my knowledge resurrected himself, unless he meant ozzy was going into the undertaker business, that must've been it.

Current mood: Awake

Thursday, May 6, 2004

5:43PM - Oh yeagy yeag yeag

The words that incorporate yeag have returned to my vocab (i can't spell vocabularly, or i might have done then, i don't know). The "lads" and i are watchin a film on friday, shud be fun. Danny will no doubt shout at people on the way there. I need to do business tomorrow, but newcastle are on soon and i cant be arsed, but i really need to do it. OH bollocks i'll have to do it later.
Oh come on NEWCASTLE! We will draw 1-1 with Bramble scoring a header. COME ON!

Current mood: excited

Tuesday, May 4, 2004

12:15PM - OH YEAH

In B19 yet again.
I am doing some psychology work asi have to re do the test due to my scraping of an E. Mink gave me his answers so its a simple matter of copying and pasting. Not literally.
I have business test to do to as i didnt turn up for the test on friday, il do it at home, how am i getting away with being so bad at punctuality? Lucky i guess.
I just wish newcastle were lucky.
On friday i slept at dannys and had a good old time there, after we picked rushy up from his now ex job at the subway. Saturday me oli and rushy played snooker, and at night we went to a social event at roxannes, it was fun. Got to talk to my sisters mate, she was really nice, so was emma and roxanne who let me stay over.
On sunday we lost at football and i played shite and on monday rushy came round and we played on pro evo wat a game.

Off now to do work. Feel really happy today.

Current mood: Fantastic

Monday, May 3, 2004

1:32PM - Kiss my face

Thankyou Richard for sparing my blushes.

Current mood: A bit happier

Sunday, May 2, 2004

7:53PM - Its just one of those days when you don't want to wake up

Feel like shit, i take offense far too easily.

I felt absolutely great this morning like i had really accomplished something good and i could be happy and then someone says something a bit horrible and i feel like shit.

At soccerdome we lost, i played shit danny was really cool today, very funny.

Thats all thats happned.

Current mood: Happy yet sad

Friday, April 30, 2004

10:05AM - He can't come out to play today.

In B19 with oli doin nothing at all. Armando is great, i have downloaded lots of stuff off this great site. The pest thin i highly recommend. www.totalcress.co.uk/armando is the glorious site. I may have mentioned it before, but it is very good.
Well another 10 minutes of this then i can go and have politics.
Dids rainfo and precky might be comin at dinner so at least that will be fun.
Oh and my emails from winstanley have stopped me from sending anyhing, i deleted all my emails but it still says i have too much mail box,why?

Current mood: angry

Wednesday, April 28, 2004

1:10PM - Wirey tufty hair growing out of it

In B19 listening to a politics powerpoint, am i going to look back on college in forty years time and be stuck with this beleagured memory of sitting in B19?
God i dearly hope not.
All that politics went over my head, i'll re-listen in a minute.
Nothing else to write except
thats it

Current mood: bored

Thursday, April 22, 2004

6:18PM - He is dead and buried, there is turning back.

What a horrid title that is, don't know what i was thinking.
Newcastle tonight! COME ON LADS!!!!!
We'll win 2-1 i dearly hope.
I've been listening to the new travis album alot and its so so fucking good, i love it. No man who but great nonetheless.
15 mins to the programme starts, i'm so nervous, its the first time iv ever been nervous bout a match. I so hope we win.
Oh and my linc article well diary, was well received, letters written in, so i am well chuffed and thanks for lucy's well done message, much appreciated.

Off, off and stay

Current mood: accomplished

Friday, April 9, 2004

10:09PM - Live bushfarting

watched black books the other night and i have to say i hate it.
After it had been given high recommendations i thought id give it another go, but it just wasnt funny. Bill Bailey can't act to save his life and dylan moran is totally unfunny. To make this worse tamsin greig isnt believeable as a stupid morbid woman. Its apaaling. I got so pissed off with it. Not as much as Catherine Tate obviously but its still isnt funny. Its amazing what ppl find funny.
After this though, a true comedy came on the telly in the form of Father Ted, now that IS funny.
Got that out my system i can now get the hell off the computer and record dead people.


Current mood: angry

Tuesday, April 6, 2004

5:04PM - kId A

Havent updated in ages. Its been nine days and i think i've odne myself proud.
I completed true crime yesterday, very good game and i still havent been on ghost recon but im looking forward to it.
last night was odd, i was on MSN and this girl added me and talked to me. At first she seemed friendly but then she descended into a quite vulgar crude image and i blocked her, questions such as how big is your cock, put me off and made me laugh to be honest, when she started to tell me "do" things, i just waited to hear what she said and it was very funny. How can anyone think things like that would be appealing? it made me laugh, but at the same time annoyed me.
since my last update ui have been writing a book, im happy with what i have produced but have much on the winstanley computer so i cant re-read it.
i dont think i have mentioned this but i bought i book a couple of weeks back by richard herring called talking cock. its funny but essentially about the male genetalia and is quite hard to read on the bus. i have read it in public though, the people in the cemetry looked worried but what do i care i'll never see them again.
i am trying hard to be normal now and not hold back what i think and be a happy person, so the next time im in college i'll be friendly and not shy, morbid and withdrawn. hopefully anyway.
everyone is going out on wednesday night for kris's bday but im not, i dont want to. call me boring, but i dont want to go round wigan into clubs with thick ignorant wankers and then get bum raped in the town centre, its not my concept of fun. i'm not saying that everyone who goes out will get raped but knowing my luck ill be the one who does. so il be in all wednesday reading and writing.
On thursday kris is coming round, so i should have fun talking to him, i havent talked to him in really in ages, only on MSN. i think thats all iv done in the past week. o i got a B and a C in politics so i am very happy at the moment. err thats it i think i got them radiohead CDs too i only listened to one so far and its very good.
oh at the soccerdome we lost 21-0 in our first league match, we didnt do too bad as the scoreline doesnt suggest, we were ok. Dillon who i havent seen in a long time played for us and i heard many strange stories about what high school was like for him, he was a bad egg, there are too many things to remember what he'd done, but the worst was getting a police escort from the school! what hasa happened to my old friends? oh and precky picked me up in his car on the way back! yes my friend who is MY age, can drive! it tokk me a while to realise how normal this is, but he's my age! he let me drive it too and i did alrite in it too, i went about 20 metres in ASDA carpark, my first drive was a success!
Oh well back to reading.

Current mood: anxious

Monday, March 29, 2004


Havent updated in a while. This is the longest i've gone since making it. Its like heroin, i'm gradually getting yself off the horse but have to come back for little samples of the coolthwax just to ease my way off it, and eventaully i'll never enter again! or die to take the metaphor a stage further.

Current mood: awake

Wednesday, March 24, 2004

11:56AM - Its like an African clog machine

I have the greatest hits so far of PIL its actually alrite which is a surprise.
i did my politics test and now my hand is killing me so much, wrote 8 pages about nothing.
just felt the patch of hair thats not been touched by gel, il put it on later.
thats it.

Monday, March 22, 2004

11:44AM - Whats he doing in there? Nothing much, he's dead.

well how weird i got the scorers the the final outcome of the match right on saturday, how weird is that? very is the answer. it was obvious thatd be the score though.
seventeen was an odd experience, i recieved love and presents and thats all i wanted. and thats my update, o today i talked to this really nice girl, nothing will come of it though, it never does.

Current mood: Cannot be arsed

Saturday, March 20, 2004

1:54PM - You may not play by the rules but by christ you get results

Peep sow is amazing, oh how class.
last night was so so weird. Kris didnt come coz he has a girlfriend called debs, thats a bit bad, he cudve just come for bit, but no he didnt because he had to go to hers in the mmorning, its a shame coz i wanted to talk to him, aint seen him proper in ages.
Anyway, me and danwad went to olis first, then rushy came and we watched human remains whilst drinking smirnoff. then Rhino came and drank 4 bud ice in 30 mins, how? it tastes like sweat. we listened to limp bizkit in the "potting shed" as danwad calls it. hen dave came and was great, dave is great, so cool, he was great. anyway then rhino was drunk so me and him went in the woods and found a chair and sat on it, then dave followed and we threw this metal bin into a stream. Then danny hit me on the head with a bottle and rushy fell and i caught him. Then tom made some hot dogs and dave gave tom (olis 10 year old brother) beer for some crisps. Then dave, rhino and me started to throw bottles at this tree, rhino smashed his i got one and then through another, it rebounded and smashed the pool house window! o my god it was awful, i told oli and he werent that bothered but he was drunk, i owe him a tenner for it though. all this happend and roxanne phoned me, so her and nicola came round, oli was lost somewhere and danny flirted with nicola and got her number whilst rushy kept saying touch me roxanne. i felt weird and fell over a lot, danwad took nicola and roxanne and me to the bus stop, danny really likes nicola, aw. Got back to olis to find him sat outside in the middle of the garden in the rain being sick, it was funny.
After this we left oli, and all went to Asda, it took an hour, at Asda we lay in the floor there whilst eating the easter eggs dave bought me, great. Then rainfo and dave ran to the top floor and then ran back down for no reason at all. and on the way back, rhino threw a bit of easter egg at a van and it stopped! i shit myself. this is the conversation between rain and the van man:

V:what you just throw?
R:a bit of easter egg
R:some easter egg
R:i dropped it
V:are you going to do it again?
R:No mate

it was hilarious. how can you drop a easter egg 20ft in the air. brilliant.
when we got home, i went in the caravan and oli was no were to be seen. danwad,rhino and dave slept in the pool house with the remains of broken glass everywhere.
when i got up i went back with danny earlier than usual, i am so tired now. danny is gonna go out with nicola i bet. i hope so anyway, he deserves a girlfriend.
and thats all the weather.
god iv written a lot:
Newcastle 3-1Charlton
Bellamy Jensen
Shearer 2

cant believe it only 3 oclock, god im so tried i mite revise.
Whey its my birthday tomorrow though, hip hip hooray for me, yeah 17. i wonder wat its going to be like, if its anything like 16 i think il be very disappointed.

Current mood: Tired

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